More Advice for Julie, Whose Nanny May Have Bipolar Disorder
From Team Trouble member David:
Absolutely the children come first. My question would be whether this is a one strike and you're out deal or whether setting ground rules going forward would suffice. In this specific case, the fact that Mary has already exhibited irresponsible behavior would indicate that she really shouldn't be taking care of children on her own.This is a tricky issue though. A couple years ago I opened up (spilled my guts) in a small group setting concerning my struggle with depression. When I got home there was a message on the phone from one of the attendants who was a first grade teacher struggling from depression. She had been told to make sure none of the parents learned about this. And this just points once again to the stigma and often enforced isolation and silence concerning something (depression) that can be managed effectively.
We want people to be honest but we punish them when they are. I personally WANT people to know about my condition. It's going to come up eventually anyway. There's a lot of gray area here, dont you think?
More advice to come...
Comments
Liz, just to clarify my last post: if someone with any kind of disorder is a danger to a child, they shouldn't be in a care position. Period. I think I was trying to delineate between that situation and one where a person has a condition which is effectively treated and poses no inherent risk to the child. My concern was that many people are completely ignorant about mental illness and that there is a built in prejudice about what a person with a condition can do effectively. Unfortunately, this only encourages people to keep their illnesses hidden. I didn't mean to imply that there was any gray area about whether an unfit person should take care of children. (The only reason I'm writing this is that you agreed with the two other posts. Am I reading too much into it?) Two other topics which might be of interest are 1) The importance (or gift) of being able to maintain a sense of humor even during the lowest points and how this can help. You seem to have a very active sense of humor! 2)I feel I'm a much more empathetic and less judgmental person since I've gone through my ordeal. How have others changed for the better or worse? Dave
Posted by: David | May 20, 2008 07:24 PM