Okay, here's what she said
![76521343[1].jpg](http://trouble.philadelphiaweekly.com/archives/76521343%5B1%5D.jpg)
Here is the full text of Dear Harriette from the New York Daily News:
DEAR HARRIETTE: My best friend is bipolar. Two years ago, he told me he was going into a depression and not to contact him until he contacted me. I waited a year and a half for him. All that time, I sent him cards and e-mails saying we were still friends.
Out of the blue, he contacted me six months ago. He is on a newly introduced medication. He says it feels better than what he took before. He is nothing like the man I used to adore. I don't know if this has to do with his being bipolar or if he's just a bad friend now. I resent that I waited a year and a half, only for him to become this selfish, self-centered person. Do you think this new medication has cured him, and his true personality is a selfish one? Alternatively, do you just think he is a bad friend?
Camille, Oakland, Calif.
Dear Camille: Bipolar disorder is not something you have one day and not the next. It is a health condition that can plague your friend for life. You may never have the same relationship as before, but that doesn't mean you have to write him off. If possible, let him know you care about him and miss his friendship. Read up on bipolar disease to understand what he may be going through.
DEAR HARRIETTE: I'm 13 and in a deep depression. I have felt this way for months and haven't admitted it before. I have feelings of hate toward myself. I have trouble sleeping. I eat about one meal a day. I have the overwhelming feeling of being alone. I feel like an empty shell of myself.
I need professional help, but my mother won't listen. She writes it off as me being "dramatic." She tells me I'm a normal 13-year-old and tries to make jokes about it, by pretending to cry and saying, "Boo-hoo." I need her to see that my problem is serious and need to see someone.
Brenda, Queens
Dear Brenda: You are wise for recognizing your emotional state. Recognition is usually the first step toward a cure. Many teens have emotional difficulties at this age. You do need professional help. I'm sorry your mother isn't taking you seriously, but you need to find someone else who can help. Go to the counselor or psychologist at your school, who should be able to give you advice or refer you to someone who can. Your family doctor is another resource, or even a trusted family member. The clergy at your church or place of worship should be able to help, too. Reach out to one of them NOW. Then ask that person to talk to your mother. She will take you seriously once she really understands.
Comments
Let's see, "Bipolar disorder is not something you have one day and not the next. It is a health condition that can plague your friend for life" and yet for depression, "Recognition is usually the first step toward a cure." For the former the columnist implies a potentially life long struggle and for the later reference is made to a cure. A distinction that might well not exist in reality. Recovery requires continuous effort. Let's hope that the use of the word "cure" was simply used to encourage an adolescent to reach out.
Posted by: Joe | December 3, 2007 07:27 PM
Not that I would use Happy Harriete (laser bleaching rocks!) as a source of psychiatric wisdom, but...
An accurate diagnosis of bipolar disorder does indicate a condition which will more likely require long-term treatment and maintenance of medication than adolescent depression which will more likely "remit" (i.e. go away). Mood swings are almost a given with the hormonal onslaught and challenges of teen life while the first writer's friend seems to have had more severe symptoms.
Posted by: HS | December 4, 2007 10:36 AM
Dear Camille,
My advice: RUN! If he acts like a jerk, he is a jerk. You don't get a pass on jerkiness just because you happen to be bipolar.
Bill
Posted by: Bill Abramovitz | December 4, 2007 11:41 AM