This is an entry from TTWS reader Nancy. For some reason, identifying information wasn't posted for her earlier, for which I apologize.

All I can say is that what the commentator wrote fits my 24 year old daughter to a tee. With a gene pool on the both sides of her family tree that includes schizophrenia, bipolar disorder, OCD, major depression and anxiety disorders, she remembers as early as 4th grade feeling worthless and suicidal, unbeknowst to me and her late father.

She was a much loved and wanted child who had an extremely stable/normal childhood. From day one, though, her father and I knew she was "wired" differently and because of disabling, irrational fears, hyper-reactivity and sensitivity, she/we saw a family therapist & a renowned child psychologist at 3 different times in her childhood. No drugs, just talk therapy. It helped a bit but she still struggled with anxiety & over-reactivity. We went to parenting classes, read books about "the difficult child, the underachiever and the tempermental child" and yet nothing seemed to change to help her with low self esteem and anxiety issues.

She was/is a wonderful, creative and intelligent human being, who despite our love and acceptance, didn't feel that she was a "good daughter." When her beloved Dad died suddenly & unexpectedly, she was a fragile 14 and his death was the kindling that plunged her into what first appeared to be a major depression/grief reaction, with suicide attempts, self-injury, etc. Our genetic/family history wasn't as obvious then as it is now and when she was eventually diagnosed with bipolar disorder several months later, we were all shocked. High school was hell, even with meds, but she graduated and went off to a local university and eventually discontinued all meds, w/o my knowledge.

She dropped out of school, made some extremely bad lifestyle choices that still affect her health today----she even did sword swallowing in a local anarchist show. The daughter who used to be terrified of weapons, knives, risk of any kind was engaged in self-destructive behavior I never could have imagined. Alcohol and pot became her meds of choice and after a couple of awful years for her and for me (I was doing this all alone,while grieving the loss of my husband, parenting partner and soulmate and being scared beyond words that I'd lose her, too), she found herself in an ER, depressed and drunk after a plunge from a manic high.

It proved to be an opportunity for her to 1) accept that her brain needed some sort of prescribed mood stabilizer and 2) work with a great psychiatrist who listened to her and very slowly and with great caution, started one med at a time. She has been alcohol and pot-free for 18 months and is currently on Lamictal and a tiny dose (2mg) of Abilify.She states that this is the most stable she's EVER felt, even going back to childhood. She advocates for herself and says "No" to her doctor if she doesn't agree with his suggestions. She is fully aware of the short-term and long-term risks of the meds she is on. She still wishes that she didn't have to take them ---she has had to deal with weight gain, acne and other body issues that would be difficult for any woman in our culture. But she knows that w/o them, her life would deteriorate again. She is even more accepting of this than me!I grieve for all she's lost. I wish she didn't have to be on meds---period.

She takes vitamins, fish oil and other supplements; she doesn't have a car and walks everywhere; she eats well and makes sure she gets enough sleep.

Working with our state's department of vocational rehab, she recently participated in the META peer support training program, got certification and will actually begin a part-time job next week in the mental wellness field. Her intelligence, empathy, personal experiences & training should be huge assets in this position.

After a decade of loss and numerous crises, our relationship is stronger than ever and I am so proud of her courage and resilience. She is wise beyond her years and is more hopeful than ever. I am, too.