1. You start to lose control of your saliva.
2. You frantically comb through your desk drawer to see if you have any speed left from the days when you used to be an addict.
3. You find five ephedra pills in said drawer, and don't take any because you're afraid of depleting the earth's dwindling ephedra supply.
4. You write an entire blog entry that's funny and smart and delete it by clicking the back button.
5. You catch sight of your fuzzy earmuffs and jump because you thought you saw a chipmunk.
6. Your discover the sizzling sound you've been hearing for days is not a hallucination, but your Ikea desk lamp.
7. You consider letting the lampshade burst into flame just so you could have an excuse to go home and fall into bed.
8. You download the wrong João Gilberto album from iTunes.
9. You resort to turning on the overhead fluorescent lights to stay awake.
10. You realize a top 10 list is supposed to go from 10 to 1, and you could change the order to be more Letterman-like, but you're just too tired to even do it.

Effexor rocks!